“Why should I forgive the Russians?” My Ukrainian friend stared at me from across the table, her eyes reflecting her confusion. She knew of the Bible’s command to forgive, but how could God expect her to pardon those who had forced her to flee her homeland and were in the process of destroying her country? 

Forgiveness is not something that comes naturally to us. In Matthew 18, Peter approached Jesus after the Lord taught His disciples how to react when someone sinned against them. Maybe Peter was thinking about a specific person when he asked Jesus how many times he should forgive the same offense—probably assuming that seven times was overly generous. I can imagine his shock when Jesus basically declared there was no upper limit. 

Jesus went on to tell the parable of the unmerciful servant who refused to forgive his fellow worker even though the master had erased his own debt. Jesus’ message was clear: any wrong we may have suffered is nothing compared to how we have wronged God. Therefore, we should forgive others because God has forgiven us. 

I think there are two main reasons why we find forgiveness difficult. First, just like Peter and the unmerciful servant, we forget how much we have sinned against others—and most of all, against God. More self-awareness of our own weaknesses helps us have more mercy and compassion toward the weaknesses of others.

Second, we mistakenly think that forgiveness minimizes the wrong that was done against us as if it acts as a giant eraser. But that is not the case at all. By forgiving, we give up our right to mete out justice, putting it into God’s hands instead. Justice will be served, and the Lord is much better qualified than we are to bring it about. 

So if, like my Ukrainian friend, you’re facing a situation that seems too difficult to forgive, remember how much God has forgiven you, hand your circumstances over to the Lord, give Him the right to administer justice, and move forward in freedom.